orange rocks my life

2005-07-07T03:45:00.000-07:00

sick and tired of my comp. kept lagging out. darrnnn when i go ngee ann polytech nx yr.. i'll make sure i get a non-ap laptop. bwahaha. anyway tmr gt eng test and chi ting xie. correctionss liao lar.. hahaha played 3 games of dota. haha stunned. sian arhhh nth to say le.. not the end of the worldd!!

2005-07-05T03:34:00.000-07:00

i haven't been blogging for the past one week. been on dota. ya kind of..tired of it? cos always never help team instead hai4 them. sian.. for the past one week since sch reopened, i have been slacking. ya ya its my forte. hai. still in holidays mood. the best day of the past week was most probably sunday night. i went to play basketball with ahpok jianming nigel yvonne kaixuan. sian. lost to a bunch of girls whom we played with before. ya maybe was too tired. ya suddenly feel so lost.

then homework. still trying to copy chi tys. tmr physics test and i haven't really study. sleep first then mug during midnight. tired. physically and mentally drained. yah july and august never fails to make me feel so.. argh. hahahahaahaahahahahahahhahahahhaha sian. physics time. not typing anyMORE..

_{i'm still trying to let go to something so important.. which i have been holding onto for the past.. 1+ yr. a few days to 2 yrs. sometimes i can't help but wonder if i will still receive an ecard from you..wishing me happie bday. even an email will do. seeing you, still using the email address i helped you create gave me a little comfort. and a little illusion. but im not so dumb.. cos i know everything wouldn't be the same again. i'm the one who has been holding on. no matter how loud i laugh how crazy i can be..i never fail to think abt our past each day. haahaa i may be dumb looking at the phone waiting for a call.. i may be dumb trying to check email everyday just in case.. okay just admit i'm dumb. i just want an explanation from you. yet, you can offer me..nothing. great comfort.}

2005-06-28T02:31:00.001-07:00

谁还记得是谁先说永远的爱我
以前的一句话是我们以后的伤口
过了太久没人记得当初那些温柔
我和你手牵手说要一起走到最后
我们都忘了这条路走了多久
心中是清楚的有一天有一天都会停的
让时间说真话虽然我也害怕
在天黑了以后我们都不知道会不会有以后
谁还记得是谁先说永远的爱我
以前的一句话是我们以后的伤口
过了太久没人记得当初那些温柔
我和你手牵手说要一起走到最后
我们都累了却没办法往回走
两颗心都迷惑怎么说怎么说都没有救
亲爱的为什么也许你也不懂
两个相爱的人等对方先说找分开的理由
谁还记得爱情开始变化的时候
我和你的眼中看见了不同的天空
走的太远终于走到分岔路的路口
是不是你和我要有两个相反的梦
谁还记得是谁先说永远的爱我
以前的一句话是我们以后的伤口
过了太久没人记得当初那些温柔
我和你手牵手说要一起走到最后

2005-06-28T02:31:00.000-07:00

have you ever..

2005-06-27T03:28:00.000-07:00

Have you ever:

1. snuck out of the house [lol sort of]
2. gotten lost in a city ruins [no]
3. seen a shooting star [dont think so. mark lee?]
4. had a serious surgery [LOL nope.]
5. gone out in public in my pajamas [LOL when i was young?]
6. kissed a stranger [nah]
7. hugged a stranger [nah]
8. been in a fist fight [ya]
9. been arrested [LOL. er no. i'm a good citizen!]
10. laughed and had milk/coke green tea come out of my nose [ LOL. noooo gross!]
11. pushed all the buttons on an elevator [LOL you bet.]
12. swore at my parents [ ya many times]
13. been in love [haha i don't think so.]
14. been close to love [guess so. perhaps i fantacised ALL that since that guy doesnt seem to rmb.]
15. been to a casino [nah]
16. been skydiving [no.. =(]
17. broken a bone [LOL NO!]
18. been high [and low]
19. skinny-dipped [?]
20. skipped school [LOL you bet!]
21. flashed someone [LOLOLOLOLOL]
22. seen a therapist [nope]
23. played spin the bottle [yah]
24. gotten stitches [yeah]
25. drank a whole gallon of milk/water in one hour [LOL how much is a gallon?]
26. bitten someone [ya! haha]
27. been to Disneyland [nah..]
28. gotten the chicken pox [ya]
29. kissed a member of the same sex [lol can't rmb]
30. crashed into a friend's car [nope]
31. been to Japan [nah!]
32. ridden in a taxi [bwahaha yah=.0]
33. shoplifted [no]
34. been fired [..]
35. had a crush on someone of the same sex [no way]
36. had feelings for someone who didn't have them back [hahaha what kind of feelings?]
37. stolen something from my school [lol magnesium strips?]
38. gone on a blind date [no]
39. lied to a friend [guess so, white lie.]
40. had a crush on a teacher [yah my p2 form]
41. celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans [nah]
42. been to Europe [no]
43. slept with a co-worker [!]
44. been-almost-married [!]
45. gotten divorced [!]
46. had children [!]
47. seen someone die [..hai]
48. had a close friend die [.]
49. been to Africa [no! haha]
50. driven over 400 miles in one day [i don't even drive]
51. been to Canada [no]
52. been to Mexico [no]
53. been on a plane [no, sad.]
54. seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show [no]
55. thrown up in a bar [no]
56. purposely set a part of myself on fire [LOL ya]
57. eaten Sushi [ya]
58. been snowboarding and skiing [er no]
59. met someone in person from the internet [lol ya]
60. lost a child [no]
61. gone to college [not yet. going to ;)]
62. graduated college [lol-.-]
63. done hard drugs [NO!]
64. tried killing myself [no.]
65. fired a gun [no.]
66. purposely hurt myself [lol]
67. taken painkillers [panadols]
68. miss someone right now [lol ya]
69. tried to wash away some feelings by banging myself on the wall [haha i try other ways.

lol.

2005-06-25T19:21:00.000-07:00

food for thought. ;)

hmm just read someone's blog. haha a junior whom i don't really know. know her by name only. but her blog stuns me. one or two entries with vulgarities is still okay. but almost all her entries contain that f*word. LOL not that i'm interferring with her choice of words. but i think she used vulgarities cos they think they're cool. haha. but she is making me laugh my lungs out. somemore she used vulgarities over minute things. haha. that's not the point YET. the point is i think she is trying to imitate famous bloggers like xiaxue.blogspot.com or kennysia. haha for those who don't know who they are, its okay. they're not exactly popular but people who worships them are most probably dumdums without their own style. (watched too much flintstone. dumdumdumdum) ha, i'm not going to mention her name not because i'm afraid she will cry.. its because i'm just stating my thoughts in my own blog, but not at the expense of tarnishing her reputation.

yeah! 1 more day to sch reopens. and i'm left with so much homework. yesterday peck smsed me asked me what hw to do for geog. haha stunned. immediately called qianzhi. found out we have to do one development assignment. wahh sian. added on to my pile of homework. haha. lets see..

i'm left with
1) 2 chem tropical
2) 1 chem organic ws
3) 4/5 of amaths ws
4) 3 ss qns
5) 2 chinese compres
6) 1 geog ws

and much of the homework i claimed that i have completed are either half-done or there are blanks here and there. haha. sigh. this isn't a very fruitful holiday for me. but at least i got to sleep late for the past one month. x) haha

2005-06-24T19:18:00.000-07:00

aha. i found someone to lend me wc3 cd and that's daniel! but he can only lend me when school reopens. ha. prediction: i wouldn't have much time to play.. or maybe i wouldn't even have the time to install. but hecks. 50+ days to prelims. 2 days to sch reopens.

lets see, what have i done for the holidays.
-work
-el camp
-tiny bit of basketball
-whining
-sleeping
-1 bbq outing 4c.
-1 lan outing dotapple.
-1 bday outing 2e.
-1 seoul outing 4c.
-homework. \ 2 reviews. many physics assignments(handed in). half of 2 emaths ex. half of 1 chem tropical revision. 1/5 of amaths ws. 1 jian bao. 1/2 of chinese tys. 1/2 of 2 eng compres. LOL and nothing else.

what am i left with?
-half of emaths. 1 and a half chem ws. 4/5 amaths ws. half of chinese tys. 1/2 of eng compres. 40 eng drafts which i don't intend to do. 1 eng longman ex. ss notes. 3 ss qns. omg. aha, i bet i couldn't finish on time.

^siaox. who can?
but anyway life is getting boring without dota.
aha. no tagboard no comments.
nono, i'm not isolating myself from the others.
i'm just plain lazy.

zzz

2005-06-24T02:08:00.000-07:00

DAMN IT. i'm so bored. but besides that point. argh DAMN IT.
i was so bored that i downloaded gunbound to play. woah change until like other game like that. not fun. i even played hearts on my computer. and pinball. i even tried yahoo pool which was so damn lag. i mean its not my comp who lag, but the people who played with me. i'm so bored, which explains why i'm here writing this boring blog. freak.

i think im seriously in a god damn foul mood. what the hell. warcraft got deleted. tried to borrow wc3 cd but people refused to lend me. okay i can understand. why the hell he went and delete warcraft is still a mystery but i don't bother asking him so i assume. i shouldn't have host that game. but i still think it wasn't my fault. and he shouldn't delete. what the hell. freak. ha-ha. i am enjoying the life of autism. talking to anyone feels so wrong. freak. yah maybe i scare if i talk more, there is a higher chance of me offending them. freak. freak. freak.

i'm so bored. i can't play any game. and freak, there's more homework to come. i think i screwed up my own life during the holidays. what the hell. and for goodness sake, i'm not pmsing. it just feels so bored yet i have so much to do. and so much to clear. and freaking her only knows how to yell and scream and shout. nothing seems right. argh

okay i think i'm feeling hell lot better after typing this freaking entry.
but i'm still bored.

freak a friday. i hate fridays.

2005-06-22T18:45:00.000-07:00

yesterday was a very happening day. went out with 4c'05. LOL YEAH good outing i think. LOL though many girls didn't turn up. haha i was rather surprised to see that there's more guys than girls. but anyway. yah i arrived at boon lay at 1045. LOL on time. thought i would be late. in the end sotong reached at 1115. haha we waited for some people.. then we went to seoul garden for lunch! yeah. student's special. lol then peckboon started to take out his calculator and calculate the amount of money each person has to pay. cos down there write 8.99++ mah. LOL these kind of restuarant is pian money one. LOL.hahhahaa

okay.. then we went seoul garden.. sotong micheel qianzhi and i shared a table. lol i think we are the most normal people there..cos the other 2 tables got weird things in their steamboat one. LOL haha had much fun eating with them. then after eating we went to play basketball. wahaha yah.. then hor.. the guys went played soccer mah. after awhile right they came back and sat down besides the court..talking lar.. then 2 policemen came and took down their names. LOL. and their reason was to "prove that they were there at that point of time" what the hell. i think nowadays very peacefull.. so they nothing find something to do. LOL. haha but it was pretty funny. haha

then the guys joined us in basketball and we played for awhile. ya then mingming and jialin came..we played more.. then some girls left for movie.. so we decided to play soccer. LOL. ya but in the end some of us watched 5 of them played against other people. LOL. we lost.. but haha good match lar. haha then we went off to boon lay to meet the girls. (they couldn't watch the movie i think) then we went shuhui's house to play lor. hahhaa

played bridge. then taught them asshole daidee. LOL so funny. i was a King then demoted myself slowly to a queen..to servant then to asshole. blearghz. haha okay lar i gtg le. buaix

2005-06-20T23:53:00.000-07:00

sian. my dota is gone.
either wait for my brother to install again. or get cd from my friend. sian. sian. sian. AIYAH really very sian.

2005-06-18T20:40:00.000-07:00

replies to tag.
hey dorothy thks too.
to chun. my life doesnt revolve around dota. dota revolves around my life xP haha no lar.. just a pure game. fun leh!

haha just now played dota with haoting. played like a noob. though im still one.. but i think today really very noob. haha firstly cos my razor got chosen by others. then i used drow ranger. LOL i only know must buy mask of death then madness. grr. then i keep dying lar. noob me. today shall play with class again.

yesterday night really very hot sia. i can't sleep even when the air-con's hot. brr. sia lar. then i slept at 12 yesterday woke up at 940. i think the latest i will wake up at its at 1020 liao. sian arh.. tired but can't sleep. homework piling like mad. if i place every piece of homework on the floor, i think it can cover the area of my house. LOL. (my house is not small k) sian arh.

SIAN ARH SIAN ARH SIAN ARH. go liao. will be back.. at 5. ;)

2005-06-18T04:16:00.000-07:00

LOL YEAH! just now played 2 rounds of dota with 4c people. so vic's 'don't-want-to-play-anymore' turned out to be a misunderstanding and a false alarm. hopefully yihong changes his mind about dota. then we'll have 4c dotaians again. LOL! then the 1st match i was with kiat and jh. lol we won. it was a good match lar. i had 1 kill! i forgot who i killed but anyway i think it wasnt the best i did lar. cos 3 mins into the game i got killed by CREEPS. (so dui lian) lol but its because my comp lagged then can't run away you see. lol

2nd match. at first was 4v3. i was in the team with more people.. lol.. then peckboon became my first blood! yeah. LOL then he lagged out i think. soon it became 4v2.. it was chao unfair lar.. but jh and kiat stayed all the way. (good spirit sia) i was in the sentinels team with leeyang elgin and vic. haha i had 5 kills (i think) and TOPPED the game with highest score. pure tyconess plus i kept ks. sometimes its accidental cos attacked tgt mah..gtg

2005-06-17T20:59:00.000-07:00

lol dota entry.
wahaha just now i went bnet and played with a bunch of pro pple. haha they're really pro lor.. lvl up so fast.. and have like.. 7 kills. but i killed that person with 7 kills 2 times. means.. im quite li hai also. lol normally if i play with 4c people right.. i will have 0 kill and many deaths. lol.. cos they all very li hai in running away.. haha lol.. and today that game right.. i got 4 kills! haha what an achievement. and some being ks-ed by others.. but it doesnt matter lar.. we are winning like siao then people started leaving. sian -.- loser. okay lar.. they claimed "no point in playing cos sure lose" before leaving. true lar.. then it became 5v3.. 5v2.. 5v1..5v0.. 4v0..and i left. what a game. SIAN ARH. i didnt manage to see my score for that game cos i clicked "exit prog". sian sian sian. DOTA! haha i feel"most li hai" in this match. and surprisingly i was using the same old razor. i gained my desolator pretty fast i must say. =x haha yeah somemore i had boots of speeds. and before i left i had 4000+. means my gold huh.. wah damn rich during that game. muahaha but i wouldn't say its a good game since pple give up halfway. come on lar..either win or lose right.. muahaha lol somemore that match right.. i think THE OPPONENTS thought i v li hai. then hor.. got 2 times hor.. 3 heros gang me lor. freak of cos i died. if i don't.. i think i'm really v pro liao... too bad i'm not. but for the 2nd time.. at least i managed to kill one before dying. serve the person right for ganging up on me. haha

later might be playing with 4c again at 5. lol hopefully i can get more kills. but then according to elgin, vic and yh like don't want to play liao. so sian. if bnet's down.. no vic no game. using lancraft mah. and SIANER thing is.. just when i'm about to get the hang of the game, they dont want play liao. good play sia.

2005-06-17T19:45:00.000-07:00

lol yay finally im updating my blog again

LOL THANKS OLIVIA for tagging me to update me what you have been eating -.-
joker lar you. and i'm one too.. CAN't tag my own board. LOL.. forget it.

haha had bbq at yanlu's hse yesterday. actually i think its buffet lar.. didnt eat much.. played bball.. some stupid guy just can't get what i said. and left when he has nothing to say. i can only say he's dumb. i also dont want things to turn out like that one k. freak him. but i heck now. yesterday celebrated yanlu's birthday then seasons minus xiuhui left at 11.. haha i reached home at 12. slept around that time. woke up at 1030! yay! haha the latest so far. wanted to sleep till 12. but if i do that.. i can't use the comp.

speaking of my comp.. i had to restart and restart.. (i can't even count how many times i did that already) JUST to on the comp. darn it.

but anyway.. yawn.. so tired.

going off to play dota le. cya guys around

2005-06-14T18:34:00.000-07:00

lol.. ya.. gone.. my life in EL just ends like that. with presents and letters flooding my house. some of them i read and read again. lol ya.. if i wasn't too tired when i read winnie's 'notebook', i think i would have broken down in the lrt. it brought back so many memories. not only the times i had in eL.. also the times when i was in sec2.. when i was existant to someone.

true, i had many regrets eversince i stepped into rv. but like what tianmeng said, i shouldn't be brought down by the regrets i have.. cos they are part and parcel of my life. like what i had mentioned during the handover, not being in the debates team is my biggest regret. yes. and joining the robotics team is my biggest regret too. they are interlinked. if you guys know why. hai.. why did i make that stupid decision i have no idea. maybe i didn't make that choice of quitting debates team, i had to. and i shouldn't blame vallabadoss for kicking me out of the team despite all the hard work i put in, who asked me to join the darn robotics team which i had no interest in? (okay i admit i HAD.) then, being in EL seemed so meaningless. however it was not the case. seniors soon found out i have talents in other area xP okay enough of debates team.

cant help but think of the past. sometimes i know i have many regrets.. and i try to clear up the mess i left cos of my indecisiveness. but now i know, when someone leaves your life, he/she will never turn back again. i guess so. but its hard to say. for me, the chances of me getting back the 'past' that i want is only of 0.00001%.. but i don't know why i still cling onto that small percentage of chance. maybe its my character. wo bu gan xin. if time could be turned back, i would like to go back to when i was in sec2 and try ALL i could to salvage the situation. but some things tAKE 2 hands to clap. yet 1 person is enough to spoil it all. i've promised myself not to talk/think about the past anymore, but i've let myself down time and time again. i don't know. its so kong bu when i'm alone.. haha my thoughts will go wild and i'll ask myself....okay nvm. that's all about the past. i must learn how to let go.

syf 2005. things didnt go wrong. its the judges' decision. i've tried my best. i believe all other elddsian too. so.. i must learn to kan de kai. okay lol its so tiring thinking/writing about the past at the same time. its like i have to go through the same old thing again.

NOW SHIHUI LOOK FORWARD.. and what you see? hehe

o levels.

2005-06-11T01:41:00.000-07:00

finally.. i've finally stepped down! yay.. and people now refer me as the EX/OLD president. LOL. it seems like only ysterday when i received the post.. LOL.. so fast being stripped of post. lol. congratulations to Rachel, who is my new President and Melanie, the new vice president. Celestin the blackie as Secretary and of cos Stephanie who took over Cat who left a mess in the accounts of ELDDS- the treasurer.

Not forgetting my dearest Lengshan. Congratulations on your appointment as the Crew leader, i have 100% faith in you. yeah. ROCK THE BSC on like what the bodyslammer and Daniel did. WOOTS. As for the 2 new posts, welfare heads, we have WaiMin And Farhanah! both come from the Ho family. hohoho. LOL hope they can make people go hohoho every after meeting. (lol no link.. i'm so tired noww..) heee.. okay last but not least, Anabel who is in charge of Publications (means say Literary and Debates of ELDDS) LOL IMPORTANT PERSON. May com'05/06 STRIVE AND OUTSHINE the PRESENT OLD COM. (so oxymoronic!)

that's the HANDOVER PART. now i shall begin my entry with the CAMP PART. on 10th june 2005, friday, the camp committee met up in the canteen with BIG BAGS especially me.. and we started preparing for the camp. wrapping food and shouting about, getting so excited for camp. YEAH

then people started coming in for the camp but i was so damn disapppointed that many people ponned the camp. FOR THOSE WHO PONNED CAMP don't bother talking to me anymore.. x( yah i was abit pissed off lar.. we spent hours planning the camp and this is the attitude you show us. THANKS HOR. names shall not be mentioned.. THANKS FOR GIVING ALL THE LAME AND DUMB AND STUPID EXCUSES hor. don't want come say don't want come lar.. abit qian bian but BETTER than lying to us lor. GO AND DIE LAR. (jkjk) okay.. but FORTUNATELY OUR CAMP BECOMES MUCH MORE FUN with camp-ponners! YEAH.

the camp started off with dramafest conducted by mel and rach. must say its a neat job done though it was pretty boring. LOL. hahhaa.. but really quite enjoyable. then seniors came back! YAY SO MANY SENIORS CAME BACK LOR! so touched. and then after the dramafest.. we had hmm.. lunch. quite nice though cos too many people then not enough food.. so i didn't have much lunch. but it was still quite nice.

AND CAME THE HIGHLIGHTS OF THE CAMP. the games. though i didn't manage to play since i was one of those who planned the camp, but i seriously believe that we had lots of fun too. lol i felt so touched when i saw juniors cheering like mad for EL. i've never seen a BETTER BUNCH OF juniors anymore. LOL SO I WLD SAY ELDDS JUNIORS ROCK! yayyyy the games finished and we had telematch.. the hungry soldiers where people began STUFFING themselves with food such as soda bisuits and lemons (eeeks) haha just to gain more points. then we played BUMPER CHAIRS and got damn wet but it was very fun. LOL. oh my god. rocks rocks rocks. and i got to play this time round. haha had more fun. lalala. then it began to rain alittle so we decided to play charade. then we had killer pt when GUAN HOE conducted everything together with Hei tung.. LOL so gaosiao when there was this catching. i thought hongtuck and tianmeng reaLLY V FORMIDABLE one but then they got caught so easily. LOL but it was many chasing two of them lar.. so.. forgivable.

then we had buffet dinner and i stuffed myself with brownies since i didnt eat much for lunch. yeah. hahahaa then after dinner we had talentime at AVA1.. at first nobody performed but then later on there were so many CORNY performances. must thank lili guanhoe and daniel lar.. and of course xinming mingming and cat.. and the sec1s.. sec2s and sec3s.. and myself.. LOl basically everyone made the talentime a success.. then we had wargame. haha damn fun!!!!! okay lar.. i can only use 'fun' to describe lar.. heehee..yeah using waterbombs to wheck everyone.. then mr lee and miss bose had water fight. LOL and miss bose attacked me but failed, and of course i retaliated. so she was quite wet lar.. haha thanks to mr lee who started the war. so fun! heh heh.. yeah then after war game, we let the team which lost sign the treaty and drink bittergoard juice. LOL i shall continue some other day..cos dota now. ;)

EDITED.

lol then handover lar.. i must thank all my wonderful juniors for being there for me all the time.. and my dearest sec4s for..not giving up on me.. and haha thanks for all the presents.. haii my time in eL just ends like that. haha i thought i was emotionally-stable.. until handover that day.. okayyy all's over. cheerios

and now, the big challenge

Olevels.

2005-06-08T03:10:00.000-07:00

LOL NEW BLOG FACE! a lousy drawing by me. WILL get a tagboard soon.
haha making this blog ALIVE AND KICKING AGAIN
BLOGGING ABOUT ME AND MY HAPPY LIFE~

okay lar.. just now had lessons in school (like duh)
then went play lan with 4c guys + leeyang
can say dota v hilarious. and i was blur throughout
but who cares? haha just play lor -.-
then vic's hp got stolen. i hate people who steals hp.
no money go buy don't THINK abt having hp lar
got money go buy urself lar.. still steal for what?
need MONEY go earn lar..
yah my hp got stolen and that dumb guy went to call..

1900s.. charity calls. and who pay?
LOL me. but that was hell long ago.
and vic commented my dad might have won a condo or smth.
LOL why didnt it happen?! hehe
okayy then we had fun playing dota then cs.. until vic found out his hp is stolen
so he left earlier. and we played till timeout
and then.. walked past police station.. saw vic inside.. go pei him
so cham
hai okay then went home.. and i played dota awhile.

camp's coming soon
handing over soon
LOL whooosh this sickening president of ELDDS is going to STEP DOWN
YAY no more commitments, which i hate-.-
LOL okay just like that.

BY THE WAY tell me if you want me to link u.
LOL that's all.

2005-06-05T04:36:00.000-07:00

hai.. so sad.. lost that tag.. have to pay hundred plus i think... thats how much i earned by standing 30 hrs non-stop. sian.. haii but i have to pay for my own carelessness.. but i still don't understand.. i keep reminding myself not to lose the tag le... but in the end.. argh. now, work = no work.

and im dead tired today. i stood for 7 hrs non stop. in the sun, luckily shaded by trees.. so equals no sun lar.. haiiiiiii aiyah derno lar.. why did i lose that taggg...

i think i'm back

2005-05-10T22:14:00.000-07:00

i think i'm back

spent a hour doing up this blog.

finally thought of some happy moments in my life

yeah 2e.

actually i also don't know what to blog about anymore.

all's not over.
in fact
its a headstart of all of us.
i'm trying hard

2005-04-22T18:38:00.000-07:00

thanks to those who smsed, thanks to those who cared.

but you guys wouldn't understand. i read through the script that we've done, then the script then we have edited, and then the script that dramaplus people edited for us, and THEn the final copy of the script. just the script alone, we spent hours on it. and i thought of the door, that we painted again and again. and i thought of the rehearsals that we had again and again, so many rehearsals that even the bsc can memorize what's going to come out next. i'm really sorry but i don't know what went wrong. i really don't know.. it hurts me this much that all my friends' efforts now, have gone down the drain.. but do you all understand.. i don't know.. i'm tired of myself crying over and over again. i'm sick of myself. i hate myself when i cry.. but i really can't control.. i.. need to be strong.. but i can't. i'm really sorry

the news did come very sudden for me. and all of us didn't expect it. i couldn't bear to think that we got a bronze. everyone told me to cheer up. everyone said its okay to get a bronze. why didn't someone stand up and said.. bronze is equally good as well? noone said that, cos nobody can deny the fact that it isn't that good. and why can't someone just slam the fact straight into my face? it made me feel worse when what came out of my friends are words of encouragement and concern

to the syf crew of eldds.
i'm sorry. i'm sorry that i didn't handle this matter well enough. i'm sorry that i cried. i'm sorry that i wasn't strong enough to accept the fact. i'm sorry. i don't deny that i still can't accept the fact that we got a bronze. and everytime i thought of that, i can't help but cry. i'm sorry for my vulnerability as a cca leader. i'm sorry. i know you guys are equally sad.. i know. i'm sorry for the fact that we worked so hard yet got a bronze. i'm sorry. but you guys worked well. i'm so proud of our performance that day that i couldn't bear to think we got a bronze today.

to seniors of eldds.
i'm sorry. the gold that we got back in 2003 means nothing now. i'm so sorry. we worked so hard trying to change EVERYONE's mindset of eldds being a slacking cca. we have been working that hard eversince i stepped into eldds, and perhaps WAY before i entered el, seniors have been working very hard too. we worked so hard, and brought eldds to the top. but now.. sorry we've let you down. sorry i've let you guys down. sorry.

to the school.
when teachers and miss ek told us this news, noone said congratulations.. and why? cos all of us know that bronze just isn't good enough. but nobody pointed that fact out, not even me. winning is just a bonus.. the teachers said that, i thought that was true too. but i'm sorry.. a bronze. there goes our school's whatever award. and i'm really sorry.

to friends who care.
thanks and sorry. but do you all really understand how i feel? i don't even know what i am suppose to feel.. i don't even know what to do anymore.

sorry i still couldn't accept the fact. its not about winning or losing. i do feel guilty cos i WAS with my seniors 2 years back, they worked so hard and got a gold. and now.. im really sorry.. im really sorry that i didn't reply any smses on friday or gave short replies. i needed peace.. i needed to think. but i still couldn't accept. sorry for my vulnerability. sorry for my inability to handle this issue. i know you guys care. sorry to those we've let down.

its exactly cos we worked so hard and tried our best, we got a bronze. i was so mentally prepared for a silver.. a gold. i really didnt think that we would get a bronze. do you guys understand? i know all elddsian understand how i feel now, but you guys know what i'm going through? its not only me whos going through all this. and i feel worse seeing my ccamates cry. i feel even worse being consoled by people who have worked as hard as me.

i can't promise if my juniors can bring eldds up to where we were again. but thanks to my juniors.. thanks for keeping the el fighting spirit going
i know we are back to where we were.
i am sorry. and sorry is the only thing i can say now.

can someone tell me why nobody said bronze is equally good? cos it isn't, i know. but we really tried our best. thanks for not blaming us. thanks for being so concern about us. i know the earth doesnt stop revolving about the sun just because we got a bronze, but my world does.

sorry. i'll be alright. i'll stand strong. i can act as if nothing has happened. i can act as if its okay. but no one can deny that this issue really affected us.
eldds will live on. and please stop the freaking rumours of eldds going to disband. freak the FREAKY aunties who spreaded the rumours. if eldds ever disband, i bet that's the day rvhs close down. and eldds, i know it seems so cliche that i'm encouraging you guys right now when i can't even accept the fact. i can only say what's past is past, you guys still have a future in el, keep the spirit burning and bring back what el lost. i'll be there for el. and thanks for so much for putting in so much efforts in this syf. for those who teared, i understand.. how much it hurts.. but i realise no matter how much i cry how much tears i drop, it can't wash away the bronze we get. i'll stand strong. i hope you guys too. i'll be there for you guys, just like you guys have been there for me. thanks

2005-04-22T03:28:00.000-07:00

sorry to all those we've let down. maybe some of you can't see why i treated this issue as if it was the end of the world. i did try to control my tears. but the more i try the worse i felt. do you guys understand? it was too sudden for me to accept. silver was the worse i could accept. sorry i really did try to stop crying.. i tried laughing and smiling with everyone else.. i felt so.. depressed. i'm blaming myself.. as the cca leader i could do nothing but cry. till now, then i realise how vulnerable i am as a cca leader. i'm so sorry. we've let the seniors down. the gold they got 2 years back.. is now destroyed by us. i.. really don't know what to say.. and i felt worse crying.. yet i can't stop crying. i do have high hopes for this syf. this is our last production and my only disappointment in el. i thought i could accept the ans, be it a silver or a gold.. but i really never thought that it would be a bronze..

why does the bronze has the power to determine our standard? sorry i still can't accept the fact. sorry that i cried. i feel so.. empty.

2005-04-21T02:54:00.000-07:00

haii god please don't let it be true. the rumours' been circulating around.. we really did our best and i know. but i really really don't want to see my friends crying over this.. and i really don't wish to see our efforts going down the drain. please. i'm so worried. what if.. i really don't know.. i'm so confused.. but i must stay calm. i must be there for my ccamates if the worst really comes true. i must stay strong.

i don't know how i will face it man. co got a gold and i'm alrdy so sad. i just want a gold for eL and nothing else. please.

2005-04-19T17:57:00.000-07:00

yesterday was our syf day. i woke up at 3 and wrote letters to all the leaders.. and went out at 525. reached je at 550 with xiuhui and huifang. then we reached school at 615. surprisingly, we weren't the earliest ones. =) many people were anxious about this syf too. then we began crowding at the hall.. giving each other letters and some chocos here and there.

then we went to acs barker.. and waited for a hr before its our turn to perform. everything went smoothly. i was in the lights and sounds ctrl rm giving them cues. ..the cast was extremely good on that day. backstage too. haha, im beginning to think that its a tradition of el to perform extremely good on the performance day itself and slack throughout. although there were some technical faults, i still feel that its a good job done. results will be out next next tues.

after syf went back to school and unloaded our props into the el store and the backstage of hall. slacked for many hours.. before going back to the last 15mins of mr ang's lesson. then after that went out with el people to lili's house. then the girls went to take neoprint and shop at fareast.. whereas winnie sharon and i stayed back with the guys to play basketball. ..hai.. it has been a long time since i last played basketball with the el guys..

winnie said something yesterday which provoked my thoughts. she said i've changed eversince i became a committee member.. then president. yah i think so too. actually i'm not the type of person who will willingly sit down there and chair a meeting. i MISS the old me too. lengshan said in her letter that she missed the old me. i miss MYSELF too. the old me.. remember when i was in sec1 and 2, basketball was my priority. i would rather skip a few hours of sleep and come school early on saturday before cca and play basketball. then would chiong back to the court after cca. where was the old me? why did i change? i don't know. then when i became a committee member, winnie and co had to stay back in school to wait for me to go play basketball.. whereas i came early to school for committee meetings. how ironical. then i became president and simply lost touch with basketball. seriously i hate the person i am now, not because i'm the cca leader of el. but because i CANT handle personal and work things. its NOT about playing basketball.. its about me.. changing because of a stupid title... cca leader of eldds. i've changed, unwillingly, to a person who i hate most.

nevertheless, i must cherish this opportunity to serve el. i'm gonna make el camp a rocking one! yay. hahahaha and after i stepped down, hopefully, i'll be the me again. this job is draining me physically and mentally. and its really ironical that i was given the chance when i didn't want it. and the people who gave me this chance, didn't want to do so in the first place too. her words "lets not make the same mistake again" kept repeating itself in my mind. was i a mistake that the last committee and the teachers made? or did i over-inference. i don't know. i just have to hold on to the last few months..

i guess i was just ranting on and on in this entry.. that no one probably understands what i have been feeling.

today didnt go school. feeling so unwell and exhausted. entirely drained. haii and my mom kept scolding me for ponning sch.. but then i think i know myself the best. even if i go i will sleep in the class one what.. so its better if i don't go bahh.. hehh after today im gonna concentrate on my studies.. wouldn't think so much about syf results. talking about that, i dreamt that the results were announced when we were in acs barker.. but i couldn't remember what was awarded to us. and straight after the results were announced.. my mind became a blank.. felt so unwell yesterday night.. and woke up at 1+ am. so tired.. god bless us please.

felt so bored at home. just updated my msn profile. http://members.msn.com/default.msnw?guids=5u62JZ4e8EQW6GHxrwkhooYb7uth3a6cP8VJ49Y4zBgHNRpMqGG3v7YmMezcq*T*5f

click here to go to the profile.. realised i have changed quite some bits. (: which is good. i've moved on! yeah. no lar.. haha just like that..

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edited. grr i've only spent one day at home and i'm missing syf like crazy. i thought of the times i worked with mingming, went to ikea with mingming xiuhui to search for props. went to cityhall with mingming xiuhui and daniel to search for props again.. all that.. conference call on phone with so many people to discuss about syf. so much efforts put into syf. IM MISSING SYF LIKE CRAZY. and i can feel myself crying inside me cos i know this will never be the same again. this syf is the last production that i have before i leave el. grr.. i just couldn't bear to think that syf is just over in 20mins in acs. working with bcs guys and girls to paint the door, rehearsing with them. winnie calling up me to ask me the procedures of syf.. she was so worried that she would make mistakes. calling up lili and guanhoe to find the suitable music.. scolding xiaohan for video and stuffs not done.. being so busy for syf has became PART of my life.. and it feels as if someone took away something important in my life. i feel so.. empty..

a tribute to eldds.

2005-04-16T18:31:00.000-07:00

syf in 2 days' time. i still can't believe. okay in this entry, i would like to thank many people for the utmost efforts that they've put in.

Firstly (as always), Mingming.. you rock my life. without your support all along, i doubt i can hold onto today. you've really helped me and the cca alot. although sometimes you have many bizzare ideas that shocked most of us, your existence really helped alot. you've always try to provide a sensible solution to our problem. thanks and thanks again.

Secondly, the cast. From day 1 of syf preparation, to the 2nd last rehearsal that we had, i can see you guys improve from nothing to something. The 9 cast members are.. Dorothy as water, Angie as auntie, Olivia as mother, Eugene as Bob, Ivan as John, Shihui and Rachel as the two bimbos, Huixin as teacher and Michelle as Catherine. ALL OF US can see how hard you guys have worked. no matter how tiring the rehearsals were, i seldom hear you guys complain. thanks.

Also, the Cast managers.. Cat and ivan. Thanks for offering "cast tuitions" in early SAturday mornings. they were always the first to arrive. thanks. you guys made this performance possible. And also, Paul.. our director, for working hard for our production too. and for providing food to the cast members..

Next, the backstage crew. The props that we see on stage don't just fall from the sky. i know you guys took days and weeks to find, make, buy all the props. And i would like to thank XiuHui the backstage crew manager (as well as the BODY-slammer) for guiding the backstage crew and leading them with efficiency. without her, (and daniel), i doubt the backstage crew will be that efficient as we see from the rehearsal yesterday. thanks. and from ELEPHANTS on stage, they've really improved, not just the quality and also the timing. thanks

The Lights and Sounds team. GuanHoe, LiLi, Winnie and Dayanna. Thanks. really. Through this syf, i've known you guys better.. especially guanhoe and lili. used to think they're slackers. but i can see that they really put in lots of efforts in recording all the sounds we want. without them, there wouldn't be such a great 'banana drama' soundtrack. thanks. winnie and dayanna, being the first-timers in control room, they really did a great job. thanks.

Then, the make-up and costumes team. without you guys, i don't even know what the cast members will be wearing on stage. thanks, for all the efforts you guys have put in to find and make the costumes. they're fantastic. Celestin, Melanie, Huihui, jocelyn.. thanks. (:

And of course, the Visual team. The whole visual team has worked hard enough to produce a great video that we all wanted. Although there were some problems along the way, i feel that you guys really worked hard to satisfy our demands. thanks.

Last but not least, the teachers. Mdm mak, Mr Lee, ..and miss bose. for always being there for us. thanks. and the Mdm Zubaidah and Mr oh, for the technical help that they've given us. thanks. and also,

to ALL the fellow rvians reading this entry, thanks for all the encouragement that you all have given us. ROCK ON RV ELDDS.
On tuesday, we're just gonna give this one last shot.. put in our best for this 20-minute play. we can do it. we've worked so hard for the past few months.. just give our best..and no matter what the outcome is, i can tell you guys, we've already earned more than what a gold with honours can give us. =) the experience, the friendship, the strong cca bonds. thanks. you guys rock my life.

________________________________________________________

edited at 15:51.
haii its sunday afternoon and i haven't started on a single homework. completely not in the mood to do homework. syf is coming in just.. less than 2 days' time. haii seriously i do feel the pressure as it seems like all OTHER performingarts cca in my sch have gotten a gold with honours..and the most unfair thing is that only 2 out of 101 schools for drama section will get the gold with honours. the higher my hopes, the greater will my disppointment be. but that doesn't mean EL doesn't have a single chance of getting. we do have. yes. hai.. and we're only getting our results 2 weeks later.. which is the start of my common test week.. (midst of common tests).. hai don't know lar..

the gold with honours is not just for me.. its for the whole cca. it will definitely pain me to see them disappointed if the gold with honours isn't awarded to us. i can't bear to see my cca members cry.. argh, okay i gotta promise mysself. no matter what's the result i will not cry. serious. cos i feel that when results are not good and i still cry.. im adding on to the.. sadness.. on a happier note, the results might not be negative too. it might be a gold with honours for all i know. arghh.. actions do speak louder than words, now that i know. i'm typing all these to calm myself down.

yah im damn worried for syf. its not about the quality of our play.. its about.. the stage performance. anyone would be nervous on stage right? but i still choose to believe that we can do it. much as guan hoe said something which is quite true.. he asked if we really think its a gold with honours standard, or even its a gold standard. to me, its more than a gold with honours standard cos we started out from nothing to something. but frankly, every school faced that too. and the judges don't know how much we've been through. so.. no matter what's the result, i will gladly accept. and the results doesn't determine how good we're, isn't it?

ARGHHHH SO SHIHUI WHY WORRY SO MUCH.

..hai the words she said kept playing in my mind. again, and again.
"we must not make the same mistake again"
much as i want to prove her wrong, but i feel what's important is that my whole cca is happy, isn't it? ARGH.. i feel im gonna have a mental breakdown sooner or later. i will just peng kui.. every time at the thought of her words. and i kept asking myself again and again, am i really a mistake. i don't know. what i can do now, is to hold on for another 2 mths.

jiayou.

2005-04-09T18:37:00.000-07:00

HAIII got the autograph passes. but then due to some last-min decision, i can't go. fREAK, abit dudiao cos.. aiyah.. the more i typed i more xin tong i am.

seniors came for yesterday's rehearsal. :) haha the rehearsal was fine, and the crew getting better except for last's rehearsal. i supposed that's because everyone's tired and worn out. okay, but i guess we still need to improve, esp for the visual parts =) there's physics and emaths test next week. and i think im gonna fail physics.

2005-04-07T02:59:00.000-07:00

slow internet. i need to wait.. FOREVER for a site to load. oh my god, and i took ages trying to check my email. actually i have nothing to blog again, except the miffy club that we have in 4c. its the CPO(chao pia Olevels) club...we've upgraded ourselves to the miffy club. slogan: MIFFY jing sheng! haha okay lar, trying to make studies sound more fun.

and what else? 5566 will be at imm at 1pm on sunday! hahahhaa i'll be there :) tmr cca day, and 12 days to syf.

2005-04-04T02:45:00.000-07:00

lololl.. yay i've won 2 bids at yahoo auctions! 1 pair of 5566 autograph passes x) and 1 5566's love single cd (not sold in singapore) YAY YAY YAY! hahaha so happy. hopefully the seller will contact me soon. x) haha then can go see 5566 in imm this sunday. loves them loads!

today another hardcore day. pe raining then can't play softball(which isn't soft) went do push ups and yehda yehda stuffs.. but i'm slacKER! yay! haha didn't do much just pretend pretend. wooots. then after pe nothing interesting le.. physics bahh.. miss tan hz GRRR.. haha i think i will fail physics this time round. heh heh after sch went ten mile with ahpok. ate lots of stuffs and saw 5566 ge dou tian wang vcds. save money time. and all that bidding for 5566 stuffs is going to make me broke. okay i'm broke enough already. have to ask for money again xP hahaha

5566 rox. tmr cca. hopefully it will be a fruitful day. 14 days to syf. ROCK ON! and.. geog sucks.

2005-04-02T18:16:00.000-08:00

sometimes the more i tried to explain, the more i'll think i'm in the wrong. but how could you say that so easily?

yesterday went acs barker to rehearse till 6. the stage was perfect for our use. but the wings of the backstage are too small. and we have gigantic props like a door, a BED, a sofa(which is the bed), a kitchen table, one dining table.. and etc.. okay our small props can fill up the right wing of the stage too -.- in other words, if there's an award for "the most no. of props", i think we will win that. okay, lights and sounds' not too bad. =) backstage crew rox and the cast is fantastic. i just can't imagine what will happen if we didn't get a gold award after all the efforts we put in. even at the thought of that, i can feel my tears GUSHing out.

then after rehearsal, at approx 640+, the whole lot of us went je for dinner. haha.. they kept asking me to treat them.. but i only had 5 bucks at the time -.- so i asked if they want chopsticks or spoons.. haha and they agreed. grr.. desperadooo. ahaha.. okay lar.. 16 more days. argh

2005-03-29T23:16:00.000-08:00

right now my blog's under.. construction.. that's why nobody can see my entries =) not even me.

"I've just got to maintain my passion for what I do."
Leonardo Dicaprio

SYF in about 24 days =) today had sexuality education by ms jiang. grr, i realised friends around me are going through the "break-up" stage now. hai, hope they'll cheer up or something.

ehh haha then nothing else le =) SYF GOLD WITH HONOURS!

2005-03-26T17:58:00.000-08:00

long time since i last blogged here. argh, i haven't start on my homework yet and today is the last day of the LOOONG holiday break. haha yesterday had official cca from 830-4, but i reached at 8 (tried to do the sink) and reached home at 8+ cos i went ikea with mingming and cat to look for props. yesterday had 1 full run-through and many rehearsals. our play exceeded the time limit by 4 mins. haiii.. okay 26 days to syf. yesterday went ikea 2 times!! haha first time was to buy wallpaper and a dish rack. then we went back to buy 5 stands, one director chair and door knobs. haha hopefully our sink turns out well x) anyway, guys in our cca still have the same attitude (I FEEL).. slacking, and playing basketball.. grr.. i don't mind them playing.. as long as they finish up the work. but i hate people with WORDS louder than actions.

i'm beginning to feel sick after being drenched in the rain. i was trying to download ge dou tian wang vcds just now, but i don't remember what program i lack. argh, the only way out is to save up and GRAB the vcds once they're out in singappore x) okayy.. now i must save money for a few things.. (most are 5566 stuffs)

1. ge dou tian wang vcds 5566!!
2. ai shang qian jin mei mei vcds 5566!!
3. 5566 ge dou yuan sheng dai soundtracks.
4. mvp qing ren part I ( MINE IS GONE. grr )
5. Westside story vcds

*Hmm.. i doubt i will be able to save up ENOUGH for all.. so you guys might want to buy for my birthday larrrr.. haha :D :D

yeah~! cca meetings on the next two saturdays last from 830-6. wooosh. we'll be rehearsing in aCS barker. hopefully everything will go smoothly (:

2005-03-23T02:31:00.000-08:00

TO WHOEVER'S READING THIS.

if you feel that i owe you an apologize, here's one.

sorry.

2005-03-19T18:38:00.000-08:00

Saturday, started off with my cca. and FREAK, the attendance was atrocious. Less than half of the cca came for meeting. FREAK and its 32 days from SYF. ARGH I DOUBT MY CONSTANT REMINDER works for them, they don't seem to have this sense of urgency in them. and i have had enough shouting screaming at them like a mad girl. okay actually i didn't shout and scream much. i'm surprised at myself too, for being able to curb my temper. And, my day became WORSE when mingming and i went down to the staffroom to call up the absentees. FREAK, most were still sleeping. Some forgot about the meeting. FREAKER. and the FREAKEST thing is SOME claimed that we didn't tell them there's cca today. FREAK FREAK FREAK. i'm 100% SURE that we have given them the schedule way before the start of the March holidays. FREAK, what lame excuses. and, they blamed it on the committee.

and the WORST thing happened, when mingming and i were discussing about the next committee with Miss Bose. knows what she said?

"WE MUST DECIDE CAREFULLY AND NOT MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE THAT THE LAST COM MADE LAST YEAR BY DECIDING ONLY THE NIGHT BEFORE"

and who's the mistake?

of course, its me.

BBQ gathering in the evening was quite successful. over 10 people came. we had fun, laughter (Especially when xiangjie sang)

AHHHH FREAK, i'm seriously not in the mood to blog about the happy thing.

2005-03-18T02:10:00.000-08:00

argghhhh stupid dumb holidays. i haven't done much homework. okay, truth is, there is SO MUCH homework that it seems that i haven't done any. and, i didn't have the luxury of sitting in my room, concentrating on my homework. what i did during this holiday was to spend time in el, EL AND MORE EL. i'm not complaining about the fact that i have to be with EL for most of my holidays. i just can't stand the fact that people demands SO MUCH from me, and they seem unwilling to contribute.FRREAK. i couldn't stand it anymore!!! ARGH. okay i'm so tired. didn't want to get off the bus just now.. HOW I WISH I COULD SIT IN THE BUS FOREVER. oh man. argh, tired! syf gold syf gold syf gold. who doesn't wish to get a gold? but gold award doesn't come about just by saying.. props are missing, people are ponning cca. FREAK. and what? i have to have faith in them. FAITH!! AND TRUST!! AND CONFIDENCE. god, tell me if i could survive till 19th April?

homework homework. SUCCCKS. and i think i'm feverish, AGAIN. why do i always get sick in the middle of serious work? grr.. i feel like ponning school for the whole of next week. haiiii, CHEER UP SHIHUI! what's the point of complaining here? i can shout at the bsc members and scold like mad, but i doubt the guys care. and how many guys we have, 5? 6? ARGH. there are so much to do, so little time left. just 33 days left, and i still have people ponning cca. great.

ARGH WE MUST DO IT! WE CAN WE CAN.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRISTINE. (ahhh a nice ending for this entry... at least?)

2005-03-13T02:28:00.000-08:00

i've spent the past 3 hours tidying my room, and i'm not done. GOD. haha so far i've collected 3 BIG bags of rubbish (namely my sec1&2 work and some rubbish). and i created a little 5566 corner.. yay! my sutdying desk, with all the 5566 stuffs.. haha and im only left with 1/4 space for studying xP (call that a 5566 desk instead)

went to town with mingming xiuhui and daniel in the afternoon. haha wanted to look for props but ended up walking cityhall collecting shopping bags, then in cineleisure discussing our props, calling seniors to ask for their help. so great, there's cca tomorrow. okay i think i better buck up for EL now.. kind of lose touch with what they're doing. robotics? HEECK. yay! that's the spirit for me! lalalaa.

oh yah i forgot to talk about the cca meeting on friday. i was with the sec1s as usual. haha they are a bunch of fun kids. and before i ended the meeting, all of them suggested taking me to that girl whom they said is my lookalike. wahahaha.. so i was dragged by them, to look for girl guides. OH MY GOODNESS and i first saw the girl, i was so shockkkked! i think she really looks like me. oh my god, that's her misfortune i guess =X haha really very very vvery alike. oh my god. hahaha she's xinyu from 1c.. hahaha must befriend her and make her my godtwin sis. lalala. hahahaha

i know there's problems with my tagboard but i can't be bothered about it. cos i don't know what's wrong with doodle-board and i'm lazy to change a new tagboard. so let it be.. yah, i'm THAT lazy. Christine's bday falls on next friday but we're celebrating on saturday. hahaa having bbq at fajar. i've made a present for her. hope she will like it.. haha i spent like.. 2 nights and 1 day doing it. 1 day to shop for the materials. and 2 nights + (a few hours) trying to make it look nice (but i doubt so) haha. so excited, bbq means another class gathering =)

2005-03-12T01:57:00.000-08:00

been so busy lately. syf in 1 month's time. and i feel that we haven't done much. haii but i must stay confident so as to boost the cca's morale. that's the only thing i can do, isn't it? there's cca everyday for the whole of next week (and i feel its not enough) grr. help. don't know.. just now went ttsh to complete the last 3 and a half hours of my CIP Work. i don't intend to complete NYAA anyway cos i really don't have the time. 15 hours of CIP can kill me, let alone 30 hours.

grr i hate fridays man. WHY THE PERSON HAS TO BE ME? i just want to be normalllll.

oh yah.. mingming told me that she met jamie on bus the other day. jamie told her that she broke up with michael. i was so shocked!! i really thought they would last forever -.- haii both are my seniors.. and they broke up after 3 years. and michael was the one who initiated! i really couldn't believe it.. hai.. then i saw jamie a few days ago. wanted to ask her about it. but didn't, instead asked her about lights and sounds stuffs. SYFSYFSYF.

2005-03-07T00:39:00.000-08:00

5566 simply rocks. okay finally i managed to finish watching westside story. oh man i just love sun xie zhi.. he is so nice lor.. then i watched 5566 concert vcd AGAIN. suppposed to be doing homework at night -.- but haha.. can't resist the temptation. then today in school i told almost everybody about my plan.

NEXT year, i will forgo my JC year and buy a budget air ticket to taiwan to look for sun xie zhi and be friends with him! haha then if possible get married to him and live happily ever after with 3 kids! haha sounds crazy right? for a moment i thought i was serious. anyway i think i WAS serious, but at second thought, there's so mANY things that i can't just abandon here.. haha so, while BUILDING my sandcastle in the air, i thought of a better plan. STAY in singapore and wait for him to come =) haha okay lar, this is purely crap but i think it will be GREAT to have such a handsome, nice, understanding guy as friend. seriously, i don't think i look upon him as an idol, instead a role model. yah, his charisma is undoubtly irresistible. PLUS, he has that bit of ego that makes him stand out among all other guys i know. haha and he is a guy with lots and lots of determination. woooots, i sound like i know him for years eh? haha i just love him. =) he rocks. i don't care a single thing about his fashion sense and his height. what's important is that he has a great character which i LOVE, and that makes him my favourite guy =) blearghs, it doesn't matter how despo i sound in this entry cos he's obviously a nice guy. and i'm PRETTY SURE That it isn't infatuation. cos i've been in love with him for YEARS.

i think he seriously rocks. =) TONY GOGOGOGO! - ______________ - =D

2005-03-03T00:55:00.000-08:00

results.

according to the level of satisfaction.
1) amaths- 49/50
2) emaths- 47/50
3) CL2 - a1!
4) chem 30/50
5) chinese 63/80
6) geog 28/40
7) ss 16/25

haven't get back physics and english paper though. okay lar im satisfied with my maths results, the rest are OKAY. can improve though. suddenly miss the sec4s'04 seniors..

2005-02-27T05:08:00.000-08:00

i know this would happen. i didn't know why i still try.
why can't i let go. i know its all in the past and i don't ever want to go back. but why can't i forget. why can't the memories just fade off. and why pieces of us kept appearing in my mind. i don't understand. you are just as indifferent. i didn't even know what happen. you just left me there. people said you've changed. i know, but i am not willing to accept that. where's the past, and the old you? i didn't even know that i couldn't let go till she asked me about it.
now i get it. no matter how many times i try it will still be the same. i'm getting myself out of that mess.
cos i can never go back to the past. but how much time i need? its been 1 year plus...
taking CL O level results tomorrow.

2005-02-27T02:36:00.000-08:00

haha here's an update about MY life from thursday onwards.

Thursdayy

haha actually nothing exciting on thurs, so skipppp.

friday

amaths test was okay. haha hopefully i can get 45 and above =) wahaha then after school went SR1 to rehearse interview with ciyuan and mrs lee. haha it was quite okay lar.. she didn't blow up her top despite the countless mistakes we made. left school at around 7. haha so late siah

saturday

reached school at around.. 715 met up with ciyuan to do script. rehearsed for awhile. mrs lee came with two mac breakfast set meals for us! wahaha so good siah. then we rehearsed all the way until 9 before we took a cab to chai chee techo building. wah reached le go inside DAMN SCCCCARY! all poly people dressed formally. somemore their projects like very high tech like that. wooots.waited for a while then had interview. the judges kept smiling and laughing. i supposed that's good -.- but hahaha results will be out soon.

then on the way back to school, we were on a cab. then mrs lee chatted with us about our cca, o levels and my careeeer! haha she asked me what i want to be next time. then i said social worker. she laughed and said then no need to work so hard mah. haha i said but have to go nus study for social works diploma. hahaa then she asked me if got other options. then i said childcare teacher. she smiled again and said i like taking care of children siah.. haha i said yah.

anyway whenever i tell people about my ambition they will laugh.. grr.. actually i want to be special attention teacher too. a teacher in schools for physically-disabled people. then mrs lee asked why didnt i join interact club. haha that time lower sec toot toot mah.. upper sec then... hahhaha no time le.. haha maybe next time.. haha anyway mrs lee is quite nice and sociable. just that she's too committed to teaching.

grr i haven't done a single homework.

2005-02-23T02:23:00.000-08:00

went to watch basketball match today. rv vs unity. unity won by 8 points. at first rv lost by near to 20. then ahpok and i began cheering with other girls under the instruction of princess. then we catched up by 6-10 points. can't remember.

anyway common tests week coming to an end. got back one paper. emaths, 47/50. not bad lar.. this week has been okay for me. will be quite busy during this weekend. defence science competition and i'm going to rush's office to work on sunday. =) hai don't know what to blog about.. blog seems such a meaningless thing for me now -.- haha don't know lar..

RV basketball team JIAYOU!!

`o17

2005-02-17T00:24:00.000-08:00

tomorrow's emaths. have to cramp all the formulae into my brain later. anyway tomorrow have to go bugis with ciyuan for look for fazley. then he will help us with our work. a nice chap =) hai, but i don't really feel like going tomorrow. went plaza with pokie just now. saw my dad, but he didnt see me. didn't bother calling him =X

anyway saw weiqian's blog entry talking about conditions to be her boyfriend. haha her first condition is looks! wahaha i dont deny that looks are important but.. haha last time i had a very interesting conversation with huixin. and we concluded that i can ONLY fall in love with guys who..

1) are PREFERABLY with single eyelids
2) are nice, nice and nICE!
3) are considerate and understanding
4) talk alot =X
5) are SPORTY!

but anyway huixin said the conditions i set are too high. haha yah im proned to have crushes on these kinds of guys =X haha no lar, joking. i don't think i should get myself in these kind of things. haha why get myself into the tangle now? i shall start 'chasing' guys when i'm 18 =P haha jkjk. this entry totally proves that i'm not a lesbian, neither am i a guys-fanatic. oh, here's a survey i found at friendster which is related to my entry (but i don't feel like doing) wahahaha and by the way i'm not DESPO. im just touching on a sensitive issue.. guess i'm too STREESSSSED.

`o16? lost count

2005-02-15T23:54:00.000-08:00

was SUPER DUPER ULTRA.. late today.. haha anyway it wasn't my fault. 961s were FULL of people. christine and i even wanted to take cab to school (but there was no cab either) haha then had english test. wrote a lousy compo but hecks lalala. then rae, liping and i sang YUKI's song TODAY! so happy that they know YUKI (not many people do) yuki rocks. and 5566's new album was released days ago. haha i must save money from now on, hahaha to buy 2 cds!

happy birthday to jianming! ahpok and i chose a PINK op shirt for him. hahaha.. bet he's damn happy.. =)

`o16

2005-02-14T01:15:00.000-08:00

haha i changed my blog layout.. not as orangey as before =) wahaha i love tony sun! he rocks he rocks. i love yuki too =) haha he rocks more. and jerry rocks as much as both of them. haha i'm having pre-chemistry BLUES!! haha not ORANGES -.-

cun zai rocks. anyway today is Valentine's Day.. got a couple of things from friends and one PINK hp accessory from my Secret Valentine. haha too bad its not a secret anymore =X and a rose from SENIOR which shichun assumed that i would eat it up. (but i didnt!!) and a few chocolates from people. lalala so today rocks. and tomorrow will not, cos of chemistry and after school i still have to stay back to do stupid robotics. haiii..

but anyway just like that lar =) common testsssss rOCK!

`o15

2005-02-12T18:27:00.000-08:00

PHOTO

all my cousins in my grandma's house

`o14

2005-02-12T17:17:00.000-08:00

today's a sunday. means tomorrow's a monday, also Valentine's day

went to ebloggy just now. its finally functioning properly. but i think i will stick to blogspot cos' im lazy to sign up for a new account. eldwin said he got me a rose for valentine's day!! and shichun said i EAT flowers. wahaha chun, you watch out k ..yay haha phew means i'm getting something for Valentine's day tomorrow =D

yesterday went lot1. didn't expect to see a friend there, but didn't really say hi..hecks. hai went kbox with wanyi weiqian shiya weixiang alvin and yanmin yesterday. wahaha it was quite fun lar..haha all of us were hyper. then went alvin's house played mahjong. then went home slacked. happy valentine's day to all! +D

`o13

2005-02-11T17:44:00.000-08:00

13TH ENTRY! wahaha.
okay. chinese new year has been not too bad for me. except for the false alarm that i'm not shortlisted in tkk. GRR I AM. hai, this means staying back in school despite its COMMON Test week. talked to Ciyuan on phone yesterday until 11pm. i guess i wasn't paying much attention due to the fact that i'm tired, and also it wasn't an interesting topic to talk about. Robotics, how fun can it be. but she was complaining to me about the project and how tedious it will be for her if she has to do it during the common test week. i feel the same way but didn't want to say anything about it. sigh.

chinese new year. wahaha got to see many of my cousins, all from my dad's family. we played mahjong, cards and some games all day. haha i played with my baby cousin, Joelle. haha she had a fever on the first day of chinese new year. aww.. haha i just love her man! wahahaha so adorable. lalala. basically we just waited in my grandma's house (headquarters for angbaos) for people to come.

cross country yesterday was fine. i sprinted the last few metres and came to know that there wasn't milo van this year. felt so cheated x| then went out with 2e people for reunion dinner. not bad, 16 came +) then we sat down at some staircases outside westmall to talk. i think 2e still rocks. =) argh, my 6d outing clashes with 4c's one. maybe i will go for 4c's dinner at marina bay, but its way too far.

`o12

2005-02-09T17:38:00.000-08:00

OMGOMGOMGOMG!!!!! OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!
OMG i still can't believe man! WAHAHAHAHA! february isn't that bad afterall.. =)) my tkk was not shortlisted afterall =D YAY!

+) wahaha i love new yeaR!

`o11

2005-02-08T17:49:00.000-08:00

YAY! IT'S CHINESE NEW YEAR!!
wahaha yesterday had conference call with 6d people. they wanted to call me at 1130. then i stayed up to wait for them to call in while reading ss textbook and i fell asleep! wahaha then can't exactly remember what happened. so many people sms-ed me happy chinese year msges! wahaha then i got my 2nd angbao from my parents. 1st was from my uncle. =) later going to visit grandma's house. woooots.

okay, my chinese new year's resolution.

ERHEM. firstly,

gold for syf, among the top 4!!
l1r5 6 for o levels.
more gatherings with my respective classes, 6d, 2e and 4c.
become fairer (hopefully)

wahaha.. okay i'm so hyperrr today!
=D happy chinese new year to all

`o10

2005-02-08T01:28:00.000-08:00

yay its chinese new year's eve. met with the few usual people + yanmin to take 961 to school again. our celebrations only lasted for around 45 minutes. didn't really feel that it is chinese new year's eve. after celebrations went for house meetings, decided on a few cheers and so on. then after that went kap with weixiang and yanmin to lag. and to look for shuai ges.. wahaha they are despo gays =X wahaha when alvin joined us, we went back to zhenghua's old building to wait for the rest to come. haha surprisingly there were many guys today.. we took some photos and talked for awhile, waited for wanyi jiaxin and weiqian to come, then went plaza for lunch.

grr.. i still have to do my physics assignment either today or on thursday. and next week's common test week. okay, i still can't believe that tomorrow is first day of chinese new year.

`o9

2005-02-05T17:13:00.001-08:00

yyyeahh yesterday was so crappy. shichun sms-ed me and asked me to call yvonne's hp. then we had conference call! wooots all seasons were in the conference call. i haven't have a conference call for quite a long time. remember last time always conference call with so many people.. then will crappp.. miss those days but i don't think i want to conference call with them again.. haha waste hp bills.. then yesterday conference was very crappy. we were discussing where to go swim.. then i told them some jokes and shichun laughed like crazy and told the jokes to her brother too. wahaha so fun. today going swimming with them and after that we'll go mac and study! wahaha so studious hor lalala.

new year is comingggg!! wooots okay i know i sound hyper today.. perhaps its because i'm going to see my beloved seasons later on =) long time since i last went go with them. then tuesday might be going back to primary school. depends on their plans but i heard from my sister that she got chased out by the school attendants. eek x| sucky. saw alvin's entry on primary school friends + yvonne. wahaha i shall thank my primary school friends too, for being friends with me (Some for..almost 10 years, some 7 years..) wahaha rock on! and more gatherings pleassseee! haha..

i want to pon school on friday. ITS still chinese new year and we're having cross countryyyy so inauspicious wahaha. stupid larr and the stupidest thing is TKK's competition. ARRRRGH.. i can't wait for february to be over.

hahahahhaa seasons ROCK ON! wu ding forever! lalalalalala

`o8 2nd update

2005-02-05T02:53:00.000-08:00

My Confession
by Josh Groban

Album : Closer,
Closer- DVD version,
Closer (Internet version)
Submitted by : Heater
Corrected by :

I have been blind
Unwilling
To see the true love
You're giving
I have ignored every blessing
I'm on my knees
Confessing...

That I feel myself surrender
Each time I see your face
I am staggered by your beauty
Your unassuming grace
And I feel my heart is turning
Falling into place
I can't hide it
Now hear my confession

I have been wrong about you
I thought I was strong without you
For so long
Nothing could move me
For so long
Nothing could change me

Now I feel myself surrender
Each time I see your face
I am captured by your beauty
Your unassuming grace
And I feel my heart is turning
Falling into place
I can't hide it
Now hear my confession

You are the air that I breathe
You're the ground beneath my feet
When did I stop believing

Cause I feel myself surrender
Each time I see your face
I am staggered by your beauty
Your unassuming grace
And I feel my heart (is turning)
Falling into place
I can't hide it
Now hear my confession

I can't hide it
Now hear my confession

Hear my confession
(And I feel my heart is turning
Falling into place)

haha besides "you raise me up" this song is nice too

`o7

2005-02-05T01:54:00.000-08:00

i hate February. especially this February.
This week has been atrocious for me, and my dearest 4cians.

Our class really got into deep trouble. Besides the soccer thing, attitude problem thing, we found out that many teachers are picking on us. During Friday's assembly, Mrs Lim was walking around, checking for people wearing ankle socks. Lucky i was late, so i didn't stand with my class. Out of MANY MANY people who wore ankle socks, 8 were caught. FIVE WERE from my class. dumb.

when exactly did we offend the teachers?

Mrs Lim was obviously picking on 4cians. She saw a PRC wearing ankle socks too, what she did was to pat on that PRC's shoulder and didn't pursue the matter. whereas for the 5 4cians, they were made to buy RV socks which cost $2.50 per pair and they were made to buy 2 pairs. what the hell.. haiii i still can't understand why so many teachers are biased towards us. AND THE WORRRST THING IS.. victor, yuxing's socks weren't ANKLE socks at all.

then we were late for pe lesson partly because Miss Eu released us late(but it wasn't her fault). then mrs yeow shouted at us and made us SQUAT. that is not all. she asked us to put our hands behind our head. can't imagine that? picture a prisoner. how about that? she is so unreasonable. other classes were late for pe too, according to christine. But the other PE teacher didn't punish them the way Mrs yeow punished us or rather He didn't punish them at all. and we were made to squat like a prisoner for 5-10 minutes. UNFAIR.

haii this week has been a terrble week for me. the worst thing is, i'm shortlisted for tan kah kee's young inventors' defence science competition with that lanbong invention. ARGGHHH!! and i have to stay back almost EVERYDAY until 6 during the common test week. I HATEE FEBRUARY.

i hate RV more. its so 'rooted in tradition' that it can't even move on. there is a very serious problem in the teacher-student communication. The higher authorities just fail to see the point that sometimes, they can be in the wrong too. 263 days to graduation. grr. my life in rv simply sucks.

haha k lar..i have been so grumpyyy..maybe things are driving me crazee!! okay finally had cast auditions on friday. i sat in for the audition but i don't want to be one of the judges. but anyway, was quite surprised at the results of the audition. and i'll be the student producer of this syf play. =) hope to be lights and sounds co-ordinator too. eL ROCks on!

`o6

2005-02-02T23:43:00.000-08:00

RVHS SUCKS.
the dumb teachers are backstabbers with no integrity. okay, the whole issue was triggered off by our class guys playing soccer during bio lession(which is a free period for 34 of us) and they were caught by mrs carol lim. she confiscated their EZ link cards and wanted them to redeem it after school. FINE, we thought that was all. the guys were questioned by her after that. i STILL believe thAt my class guys were not in the wrong. NOBODY told us that we were not allowed to play soccer during free period.

then on tuesday morning, Miss Ek, our school principal made an announcement about the guys and asked them to see her. Later on, we got to know that SOME teacher has distorted facts about US in front of her. okay, fine. we REALLY thought that was all.

Wednesday. During PDP lesson, our dear form teacher Mdm Jiang came in with a serious look on her face. She was holding on to a STACK of papers and told us that it was an email of complains about us.

1st complain. The guys were playing soccer during free period. WE ADMITTED that that was our fault. but hey, why purposely pick our class? THERE WERE MANY GUYS FROM other classes who played during free periods too. Furthermore they were in their school uniform, which was OBVIOUSLY against the school rule. OUR class guys were wearing PE T-shirts. And we were the ones who got scolded. IT IS SO UNFAIR. we can't even go to the canteen to eat during our free periods despite the fact that we only have ONE pathetic break for the whole day 7am-3pm. and that short 30minutes isnt enough for us to buy anything because of the jam-packed canteen. AND THE SCHOOL EXPECTS Us to change out of our pe tee by our FIRST (which is the only) break. U-N-R-E-A-S-O-N-A-B-L-E. fine, we accept that.

2nd complain. our class guys claimed that they were not in the wrong and demanded for rights to go to canteen during free periods so that we can have an "extra" break. but the fact is that, OUR CLASS GUYS DIDN'T EVEN BREATHE A WORD ABOUT THAT. the school is obviously maligning us. MAYBE someone purposely distorted the facts so that they can get some credit.

3rd complain. (THIS IS THE WORRRRSSSTT!) many teachers complained that we are a bunch of RUDE students who don't respect teachers. what the hell. WHAT CRAP is that "teach less talk more" stuff? we talk more, the teachers say we're being disrespectful towards them. we don't talk, teachers say we are not participating in class. what the hell the school wants from 4c?? THE WORST WORST thing is that we are so astonished to know that so many teachers bear grudges against us when they didn't even tell us in the first place. what is this call? backstabbing.

they commented that our class, should behave BETTER as we have more student leaders in the class. WE DID BEHAVE ourselves, we're just a little bit more hyper, active and cheerful. grrr now i know, how it feels like being maligned by people...

IF 4c is in the wrong, we will admit and gladly change so as to improve. but why didn't the teachers tell us themselves? instead when we got into troubles, they just add on to our misfortune? TEACHERS. call themselves teachers. i have never heard of teachers backstabbing the students. if you find fault in us, please SLAM the fact straight into our faces instead go through all the trouble to wait for the PERFECT time to tell Miss Ek everything (which is untrue) . we were so angry on wednesday.

we're not being disrespectful towards teachers. some teachers just don't deserve our respect. but we didn't show it. and after this incident, i bet all of us became suspicious towards most of the teachers. and the most AMAZING thing is that, teachers who didn't teach us complained about us too. RUMOURS. hell, and they dare to tell miss ek about the RumOURS they heard. Common sense should tell them that it is WRONG to believe in rumours. AND CONSCIENCE should them tell that it is WRONG to spread rumours.

if you dare to comment/complain about us to Miss Ek, why didn't you have that COURAGE to tell us about it?

haiii i pity our form teacher. she held back her tears when telling us all that. haiii we didn't want to get her into trouble. i think she was worrying for us. haiii...

arghh.. i think forget it. we're always taught that when somethings go wrong, both sides must be in fault. but the school fails to see that point and i guess that's the reason for our miscommunication. felt abit depressed, i believe most of my classmates also felt depressed yesterday. that Mrs carol lim PRAISED us in front of the sec4s for being honest and all the crap. Where did the email come from?

this week hasn't been a great one for all of us. after the chinese new year week, we'll be having our common tests. haii...and i get tired easily nowadays. yesterday slept at 6pm but today was still sleepy in lessons. grr.. i think the "1 break per day" is killing me. i'm gonna break down sooner or later.. haiiii!! i need REST. i need SLEEP. i need BREAK. but tomorrow, i have to go school earlier to settle some stuffffffs.

a hectic life awaits me after the chinese new year week.
72 days to syf. ROCK ON ROCK ON!

`o5

2005-01-31T01:42:00.000-08:00

had a terrible headache yesterday.

before that was smsing my good pals..christine and tiongyan. both asked me what's wrong with me and gave me lots of encouragement. haha but i'm okayy lar..haha..87 days to go. =) hahaa seriously christine is one friend i can never live without. tiongyan is one friend who causes the bombardAtion of my sms usage (i think i bombard his inbox too..heck) and he's especially naggy =P. i think they're the ones who understand me the best =) wahaha pok and siqi too.

as a result of my headache, i slept late and woke up late, didn't meet up with christine and co. went school later than usual. rushed through un-done homework and all sorts of things. played many silly games in class today with the people around me. most lame games are suggested by me..like the "predict who will be the lucky guy to be called by teachers" and etc. lessons were so boring today.

87 days to go.
yayyy i'm looking so forward to the orientation program planned by the committee of eLDDS led by..mE!! haha i hope that day will be fun =))) EL, ROCK ON! ROCK ON ROCK ON.

o4` the past few days

2005-01-30T01:56:00.000-08:00

didn't have a chance to come online for the past few days. was home pretty late. i can't really remember what i did on monday.. grr heck, nothing interesting anyway. on tuesday there was a short cca meeting, then i waited for christine for 3 hrs in the school together with lengshan. wednesday did the DISC-personality test. i'm an IS..as well as an auditory learner and a literal thinker. true.

friday had cca. i was with the debates people. so stressed.. they were crying 2 hours before the competition. i was so afraid that they refused to take part in the competition. the debates coach and miss bose almost cried too. i didn't most probably because i don't feel anything towards debates anymore. i did my part, consoling them and counselling them..(i don't it was of any use) then they went ahead, debating against SA and we won. sharon got the best speaker award. friday was rather depresssssing lorr.. the script for SYF was out but it wasn't up to our expectation. i think roger jenkins wants me dead. just 88 days to syf, and we don't even have a proper script. i really felt like crying then. then went for dinner with 6d people and felt abit better..

yesterday went ttsh to do cip work..so tiring lor..woke up at 6 then didn't have breakfast until 12+ when we finished our cip work. then after breakfast-cum-lunch, went to alvin's house with qianzhi to meet up with 6d people again. the dog played with me (yah..it played with me!!) haha i'm afraid of dogs mah.. then i was so pathetic. lucky qianzhi was there to protect me..then we played with cards..ball games..and i went home with qianzhi. just now went do homework with 6d people (yah, them again) did nothing much.. except 2 maths qn and 1 page of chem and physics each.

i cant stand myself laughing and smiling when i'm crying inside..i feel so lethargiiic..why must some things go wrong? i will be alright. 88days to go..syfsyfysyfsyf!!

`o3 another day in school

2005-01-24T01:41:00.000-08:00

wahaha today i took bus to the bus stop instead of lrt..cos i bought bus concession! haha was abit rush. somemore i was searching for my handphone which i accidentally put in the refrigerator cos i wanted to take something out. then i forgot i left my handphone in the fridge. i thought i would be late, but then i turned out to be the first to leave. haha decided to leave home later tomorrow at around.. 5.55.. so early hor, nevermind..its worth it cos take together with my primary school friends mahh so fun!

what i remembered about today was i kept singing. wahaha me, singing. and mingming kept turning back and looked at me. then rae asked me to bring lyrics we have then we sing together tml..so excited..going to have a mini concert! yay..

after school went lot 1 with christine.we walked around trying to find the orange pencil i want..but to no avail. sickk popular store. then we went library and i borrowed two tv serials novels.. love novels! wahaha. after that we took lrt home. on the way home we saw something funny.. there was a couple hugging each other on the train. know what i said?

they are trying to save space. wahhaa

and christine said,

we should do that too.. lalallala we're not les..(disclaimer) today was abit hyper..in a VERY VERY good mood.. wahahaha i think i don't intend to use ebloggy anymore cos it has been down for 1 whole week and i'm sick of it being down. abit can't bear to cos the html stuffs are much easier there. wahaha guess i'll just leave my present blog this way although its abit plain. but heck. i love it the way it is orange. =)

`o2

2005-01-23T02:46:00.000-08:00

sian my 2nd post in a day.i've spent the past 2 hours trying to figure out how blogspot works..its so different from ebloggy..wahaha..but maybe i will use ebloggy again when its server is fixed. i'm still left with tonnes of homework undone. i looked though my journal and saw some quotes about memories..and one of them is..

"memory is ways of holding onto the things you love and the things you never want to lose"- from the television show The Wonder Years.

Heck whatever that tv show was, i find that quote meaningful. yeah..i have had 15 years of memories..and there were things i held onto..and things i don't want to lose. haha one excellent example is my primary school life. i love to compare things..and i'm now comparing my primary school life to my secondary school life. i loveee my primary school friends. we don't talk about grades, we only talk about fun. whereas for my secondary school, everything is so..competitive. yah, i hate competitions. though my life in secondary school sucks, i still have friends i love..and friends who love me!! wahaha.

its amazing to think about your past. some things which were so important in your life at that time..may seem so..insignificant now in your life. debates. and some other stuffs. haha..hmm take for instance, on friday night, i saw alvin talking on phone with yvonne for so long..made me think of the past when i had conference call with huixin and some other people. haha now i feel stupid just thinking about it. yah. stupid. and my memories are pieced together by my stupid-doings..wahahaha..and i miss my days gunbounding with my friends and seniors..hai..

homework homework homework..that's what my secondary school life is about. ARGH!!! feel like ponning school tomorrow wahaha but think its impossible man. don't know lar..i think i will be unable to come online for the next few days..cos i'll be pretty busy with stuffs.. i'm booked, fully booked! i'm booked by christine on monday.. cca on tues and fri.. and cip prog on thurs and wed. wahaha so busy!

lalalaaa~ haha homework time.. YAY homework!

`o1

2005-01-23T01:42:00.003-08:00

first entry at blogspot. i've moved from ebloggy to here because ebloggy has been down for the past few days. it got onto my nerves and i finally decided to switch over to blogspot. argh but i figured out that there are pros and cons cos' most of my friends are using ebloggy (this means i might not be able to visit their blogs as often as before..cos usually i enter their blogs through my favourite list) and all my html stuffs are there. heck. But again, ebloggy's server is really lousy and that is enough as a good reason for me to switch to blogspot.

thursday. 20th january, hari raya's eve. mingming catriona ivan and i went to the macdonalds near our school to discuss about EL stuffs. angie joined us later cos her lessons ended later. basically we sat down there and discussed about syf. whooshh 95 days left to syf with no decent script. we drew out a schedule for syf and decided to propose to Jenkins. great. then we discussed about orientation stuffs wahaha we'll be using the same stuffs again (with the cca CHASING me when they complete their treasure hunt) then we went back to school to wackyn the place, and chose the suitable sites for treasure hunt spots. then went home with the chinese orchestra people cos of pokie..haha

friday & saturday. The 6d gathering was VERY VERY fun!! haha.. we met at the cck mrt station and took train to cityhall, went suntec's kbox..haha everyone was very shy except for christine and i think she sang pretty well. haha oh yah people who went were me christine yvonne weixiang alvin steward yanmin (xiuyi joined us later) kbox-ing was rather funny lar..wahaha then we went to oriental hotel to place our stuffs before setting off for east coast park to cycle and skate.i lost the locker's key when i was skating. i think i lost it when i knocked into a girl on bicycle and perhaps the key accidentally dropped onto her bicycle. oh man then i sprinted around east coast park (with my skates on) trying to find that girl. but i couldn't recognize her. GRRRR!! then i went back to the kiosk and told the person i lost the key.. the guy said i have to pay $25.. hahaha very very expensive hor.. i was reluctant to pay the $25 though i got the money lar.. so i went around to find the key lor..and my friends were all very very very helpful..i was so touched lor..haha cos they helped me search for that keyyy..we searched for quite a while but to no avail..then i decided to go back and pay the $25..alvin was very persistant..wahaha i was so gan dong lor..cos he actually carried on searching for the key despite me asking him to give up..in the end we went back to the shop, just when the guy was about to open the locker with his own key, one guy ran over and said, "WAITTTT the key is found" i was like.. OMG OMG OMG OMG. this can't be true.. wahahah the key was really found!! wahaha.. so happy.. but then through this incident i can see that my friends are all very very nice!!

haha i love them man!then we sat at the beach and talked..played truth and dare..oh yah before that yvonne told us how alvin popped "that" question to her..wahaha so funny..after that we walked like 1km to the end of east coast park to find xiuyi..and i actually forgot about RacheL! she migrated to australia...i called her and we talked for a little while. haiii..i think i will really miss her.. we had our dinner at east coast and after that took taxi back to oriental hotel..lagged there..talked awhile and went down to esplanade area to walkwalkkk..hmm then we settled down somewhere to talk and we played truth or dare again.

after that xiuyi and yanmin persuaded their parents to let them stay overnight at the hotel..although we did nothing much at the hotel, i still think the gathering was fun..partly because i was with people i'm comfortable with (and i know them at least for 7 years) and i finally get to have fun despite my busy schedule. =) our next gathering is on 5th february at another hotel!! yay!! wahaha.. i just love my primary school friends!! and i just came up with a class-tee design..tomorrow show christine alvin and weixiang first.. haha but then i think the design is very childishhh..heck..

i haven't touch my homework!!